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noise64
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Name: Daniel
Country: United States
State: New York
Metro: New York City
Gender: Male
Interests: I'm me, don't you know me? Well that's too bad, I'm not gonna fill you in. I've done that with many sites and I'm not about to start on this one. Just one thing you gotta know about me, I'm a moster film freak. Well, maybe not a hardcore one, but I love them.
Expertise: I write now, yeah... I also Direct and use a cheap camcorder as means to make Dogme films. Photography is also my hobby, but haven't taken any photos in awhile. If you want check my stuff at www.photobucket.com my album is the same name as my screenname: noise64
Occupation: Student
Industry: Entertainment
Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
Member Since:
8/24/2002
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| I'm sorry for having deserted you. I've been distracted by other things, facebook, myspace, etc. It was wrong of me, you were actually one of the few things in my life that actually helped me keep sane. I would tell you everything and you wouldn't judge or complain. I shared everything with you, my thoughts, feelings, ideas... It's been more than two years since I've last used you, I hope you don't mind I come back now.
This is good, very few people I know use Xanga anymore, and now I can be honest at least to strangers and some friends (em).
I've run into a big life block today. My doctor called me today, to talk to me about the blood test I took last week. I just got back from filming in the woods in New Hampshire two weeks ago and fell ill for a few days. Apparently, I've encountered Lyme disease. I kind of panicked there, but the doctor said that I don't have it, that I just 'encountered' it, whatever that means. I guess she was trying not to freak me out. So now I have to take antibiotics that she prescribed to me for two weeks. I'm hoping it's not serious, but I don't like the prospect of becoming paralyzed...
Socially, I'm going down the drain. I'm alienating some friends and I've become more difficult to be around with. I've totally lost confidence in myself and how I feel about my friends. Today I was invited to go watch Transformers in New Jersey with a couple of friends, they even offered to pay for my ride to and from. I turned it down, using money and family as an excuse. I'm supposed to celebrate the 4th of July with my sister and brother-in-law tomorrow but I've changed my mind and want to be home alone. My mother has been driving me nuts lately, she's worried about me for my health, which is reasonable but it's to the point of suffocation.
Lastly, I have no job. I've been working unpaid for the past two months and will continue to do so probably for the entire month of July. I've got a small commercial shoot to help next weekend, which if they 'win' the client I will probably get paid. Then at the end of the month I'm helping out with two short films, which I forget to ask the person who helped me get the job if it was paid, but most likely it isn't. Since short films don't usually pay their crew.
Those that I have worked with in the past are also driving me nuts. One keeps asking me to help him get HD cameras from other people I know, and I only know one. But after a bad experience in miscommunication and misunderstandings, I think I kind of ruined our working relationship and it's caused me a great mental turmoil.
All of these things have left me severely depressed the whole day. I did nothing but watch television, eat and went outside for a walk. Last night was better compared to today, yesterday I went out with a few friends, had dinner and drank. We talked a lot but of nothing of importance, and I barely remember what they were about. Life would be simpler if I didn't have to worry about money, my health and if I had time to be with my friends. I wish the family-like unit that I built with my friends that I've explored and shared so much with in these electronic pages. I remember when I didn't have to be so responsible in High School. I miss being naive.
I really hope change is coming. I hate to sit around in my room and mope. I was so desperate that I looked up "teaching English in China" as one of my possible futures. But remembering that I don't agree with Chinese politics, I probably wouldn't end up staying there that long. I'm definitely looking into graduate school, but that may not be until the end of next year. My friend David suggested that I apply to the apple store where he works, I'm pretty tempted to take the offer. I do miss working at Tower Records, and had that place not gone down, I would probably still be working there today as manager or something. Not that that is my dream, but it would be convenient and I would have more income. I miss that kind of environment, where I knew what I was doing and liked to help other people.
I love working in film too, but it's just a different animal. It's a more fast paced, adrenaline rush, time consuming, crazy environment to work in. It's a bit more difficult because you have to make friends with those you work with in just a short amount of time, as opposed to retail where you are given as long as a month to make friends. I wish Tower was still here!
That'll be enough for tonight. I'll bring more emotional rants next time. Thanks for listening.
-Dan | | |
| New blog entry in centries... Anyway, just wanted to promote a friend's iTunes premier.
http://phobos.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewArtist?id=269708014
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| I don't know why people don't go there often. Sure it's the most boring place in NYC. But it's no better than Queens or dare I say, Long Island! It sure does have some pretty sights though, and it makes for an interesting film location. Take the ferry there and see for yourself... or as demonstrated by my photos:
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| Happy Chinese New Year!
It's the year of the boar (pig).
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| Semester started last Monday, it went well. I'm starting an internship for a really big film, well... big in terms of who I want to work for. So, now I'll be spending my days writing scripts, planning projects, reading essays, and eating. Not much free time left in the world of Daniel.
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